A Little Ditch Water Gives You Fiber
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I have a pragmatic answer for the 7-Up bottle mystery however. 7-Up bottles are green because the soda is clear and its inventor, Charles Leiper Grigg, did not want his product confused with plain water. Therefore it is Grigg’s fault my oldest sister, Frances, beat me up when I was seven.
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I made the trek to the store and purchased the ice cold drink from the owner, Mr. Denham. Mr. Denham, assuming the ice cold drink was actually for me and not for my cruel sister, performed an act of kindness which ultimately was my undoing; he opened the bottle with the opener hanging there (there were no twist off caps in the stone age).
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I knew my sister would be able to tell the difference but the ruse of the ditch water would give me just enough time to escape. I set the formerly ice cold drink on the kitchen table and called my sister to come get it. As she came into the room, I slowly backed out so as to arouse no suspicion. When my sister took a big swig and swallowed some small leaves and twigs, I went into a full sprint.
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The race took a fateful turn when I ran back into the house. After knocking over some chairs and sliding some tables, my sister caught me and beat me up. When the chaos entered the house, it caught the attention of my Mom. She had a unique way of dealing with things. Being the mother of five, if something went wrong, she would line up the four oldest and give us all a whipping. In this way she punished the culprit(s) in an optimum amount of time. My little sister, the accident, was a baby and obviously not the one who caused the trouble. So I came out of the affair with a beating from my sister and a spanking from my Mom.
Having me go for the 7-Up without getting one myself was unfair. If you are unfair to people, you might just be picking twigs from your teeth.
Randy Russ
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